Jan. 18, 2010
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The perfect time to lose your luggage
From the Pulpit Just a few weeks ago we marked the beginning of a new year. Before you can fully embrace 2010 with faith, hope, determination, and vision you might need to lose some luggage. I'm talking about the baggage of resentment, grudges, and hurts you've been lugging around. How many extra pounds of anger have you been toting? How many flight bags of bitterness have you packed? How many handbags of emotional pain are draped over your shoulder? You aren't alone. Welcome to a very large club. We all carry battle scars from the past — hurtful words, broken promises, injustice, abusive relationships, bad habits, and more. All of us, at times, have hauled around the luggage of emotional pain. This new year is the best time to give that luggage a toss, to let go, and to start anew. So pick out something in your life that you need to let go. As you begin your new year journey of letting go, ask these questions along the way. First, Am I being miserable by choice? I think some people must be committed to misery. The hurt and pain they feel are legitimate. Someone did something awful that wounded. But rather than let go of the anger and move forward, these individuals prefer to hang on to their bitterness. They wear their emotional pain for everyone to see. Are you choosing to be miserable? Second, Do I realize that carrying bitterness and grudges hurts me more than it hurts the person who inflicted the pain? Someone reading these words might argue with me, “But you don't understand what he/she did to me!” But do you realize what you are doing to yourself by not dealing with the pain and letting it go? You are handing your power over to another person. You are limiting your potential. You are destroying your happiness. Third, Am I playing the victim? People with a victim mentality enjoy carrying around the luggage of past hurts because they think it gives them permission to be pitiful. When we are the victims we can play on others' pity and guilt, and we feel we have a justifiable reason for not being okay or for not reaching our potential. The victim mentality makes other people responsible for our happiness and well-being. But the opposite is true. We are responsible for our own happiness. Fourth, Have I forgiven? People hold distorted ideas of what forgiveness is. Some see forgiveness as forgetting the pain. Several view forgiveness as letting the aggressor off the hook. Others think forgiveness means we are minimizing the wrong done to us. The correct view of forgiveness is to see this step as the releasing of a debt. Someone has hurt you; some situation has inflicted deep pain on you. That person, that situation, is in debt to you. Forgiveness is all about you choosing to release that debt. When I forgive I choose to release you, and I don't have to see you punished in order for me to feel better. Fifth, Have I given my pain to God? I love the Bible verse, Psalm 34:18: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those who are crushed in spirit.” When we wish we could escape the pain of grief, abuse, failure, injustice, and such, God promises to be close, and to be our source of courage and wisdom. Gary Hardin is pastor of Enon Grove Baptist Church in Cedar Bluff. He and his wife, Linda, live in Centre. Comments can be sent to: garyhardin@tds.net. |